I don't know about the author of the original comment, but I personally do have OCD and ADHD. Among other things.
My husband is one of the most supportive, caring, patient, and loving people I have ever met in this life. He has done plenty of his own research on how to help me, how to help our relationship, and how to help himself when things get difficult because of my mental illness.
We're approaching a decade of love and togetherness.
My only advice to you is this: If you are truly this unhappy, leave. Knowing the mental struggles I go through daily, and knowing what I went through taking care of my father in law before he passed, I know somewhat of what your wife is going through.
I also know it would break my fucking heart to see my husband on the internet calling me crazy, not once but multiple times in a single piece of writing.
It's not as if people with OCD don't already feel that way. We know we aren't normal. Our brains just aren't wired like that of a neuro typical person.
Please, just leave her. Difficult as it might be, you both will be grateful for it because your ableist attitude toward her mental illness is doing neither of you any favors. Neither is your clear unhappiness with her familial situation.